I’ve come to the conclusion that writing can’t be for me. I like doing it, it helps me unburden my feelings, exercises the cells in my brain. I enjoy the art of constructing sentences, turning them into paragraphs and then into chapters. Finding the right words to encompass my emotions, the right time to use an extra adjective or place a bombshell in the storyline just waiting for someone to discover it.
The problem is no-one is discovering them. They lay hidden in the stories, like a world war two unexploded device, maybe never to be triggered. My ‘stories’ have little appeal, or so it seems, to people. Maybe I’m not writing well, perhaps the words don’t connect with the readers. How do I know? No comments, few reads and precious few liking the stories. If at least readers would say what the problem was I’d be in a better state to make the changes necessary.
Maybe it’s the site I use, Movellas. Sure it’s not the same as it once was in it’s heyday (2015) but it still used to be a good source of inspiration and encouragement. That now seems to have dried up, at least for me. My last story, well two chapters of it, around 15 minutes reading were posted over a week ago and as of this morning when I pulled the story, it had under 100 reads and no likes or comments. I have created the first 1D fan fiction to even poll such low numbers.
I have been very loyal to the site over the years, even when sometimes it felt like it was hitting the bottom. I try to read and comment on others but it appears I’m not regarded as a good writer. I know my writing lacks something, often grammatical errors and silly mistakes crop in. However over the past two months or so of reading loads of writing on Movellas I’ve seen some pieces that have loads of likes and are a lot worse that what I produce. That gets disheartening as it means that my writing must be worst than these. As stories are getting likes, this must mean that my humble efforts aren’t worth it at all.
So what do I do? I want to write as it gives my thoughts wings and legs. However is there any point if people aren’t wanting to read it? I have loads of ideas that I am working on, planning, but essentially am I wasting my time? Like many I’m not into pushing my work too much. I don’t know what to do if I’m honest. If I don’t publish, how will I know if it’s any good ? But if I publish and get no comments or likes, is my writing that bad? Today I’m ready to give it all up. I’ve tried, I really have but maybe now is the time to shut the door.